Soul Rant: How warped masculine leadership affects women's intuition
Today’s Soul Spark is a Soul Rant. I firmly believe that when you channel anger through the lens of love, it can inspire, illuminate, and transform. The response below came from being asked, “If you and a friend were at a bar ranting about why you’re passionate about helping them learn to trust their intuition, what would you say?”
Well, here goes.
What makes me sad is when I see passionate and extremely competent women sabotaging themselves. Their knowledge, skills, awareness, and attitude are so uniquely inspiring, and could benefit so many people, but because these women think they aren’t good enough, they choose to stay small instead of shining. They continue working on themselves — taking all the course and learning from all the “experts” — thinking someday they’ll be good enough to follow their soul’s desires.
But there’s also a part to this that pisses me off. Women can’t really be blamed for feeling this way. Society is set up to make sure women feel bad about themselves. Turn on the TV and all you see are ads that sell you products to make you look “better.” Speaking about TV here in Korea, it’s as if we’re supposed to have skin like a baby’s butt until we die! No thank you. If it means having to spend money I don’t have, and taking more time than I need to, I’ll take wrinkles and the wisdom that come with them over tight pores. Not that there’s anything wrong with skin care, especially if it brings you joy. But if it’s a measure of our value, you need to start asking questions.
That’s is just one example of how society has a contorted sense of femininity. Society doesn’t value feminine* leadership, which is more cyclical, adaptable, intuitive, receptive, and communal. It values a warped sense of masculine leadership, a.k.a patriarchy (which isn’t working for any gender identity really) that puts domination, control, ego, and overworking on a pedestal.
It’s no wonder women are feeling so unsure about themselves. They’re trying to fit inside a model they don’t intuitively relate to!
Of course, they try to:
control their outcomes;
think they need to dominate their field in order to succeed;
accept that being busy is normal and okay;
believe they need to do it all alone!
Here’s what I’d like to tell you, dear women:
You don’t need to hustle! Ease and self-care will get you just as far, if not farther.
What you know and what you can do right now is enough. It’s exactly what you need for what you want to do. You don’t need anyone else’s education or validation.
And no, you don’t need to push away or deny the challenges you’ve faced with positive mindset practices. If you want to get through this challenging time “the only way out is through.” If you ignore your honest feelings, the good and the bad, you’re just going to continue suffering, which clouds your connection to your intuition.
Your intuition is as powerful as your intellect. Actually, your intellect can serve your intuition. How about that?! And there are tons of tools for connecting to your intuition (meditation, journaling, tarot cards…) so you don’t need to force it.
You also don’t have to learn how to connect to your intuition alone. Ego can’t survive in a supportive community while intuition thrives. Community is your intuition’s friend.
If you could work on even ONE of these premises, you’d get closer to trusting your intuition. This would then get you closer to where you want to be: waking up each day feeling grounded and sure you can do what lights up your soul.
You’re amazing as you are. It’s now time for YOU to believe it. Let me know how this lands for you!
If you’d like to work on listening to your intuition within a community, please join my free Facebook group.
*When I refer to feminine and masculine, I’m not referring to gender. I’m referring to the concept of feminine (Yin or Shakti) and masculine (Yang or Shiva) energies.